Thien Han: Today won’t be about me and my opinions like my other posts were. For the next hour, we will have a historical guest, Pythagoras. TNT, an archeologist who works for me as a butler has finally learned how to travel to any time of my choice and decided to bring Pythagoras to our time. Many of you probably already know him because of his famous theorem. Everything you see below is an interview with Pythagoras. Today, I won’t be speaking. TNT will be asking Pythagoras about his discoveries and learn about the religion he created.
TNT (aka Dynamite): Hello, Pythagoras. How does it feel to be in the twenty-first century?
Pythagoras: It is my honor to visit a time where everyone knows about me and my people. What did you bring me here for?
TNT: I just wanted to know how your theorem was created because I have heard that you stole the theorem from the Egyptians? Is this true?
Pythagoras: It is true that the Egyptians discovered my theorem long before I did. However, it is still rightfully mine. They may have discovered it, but I was the one who shared the theorem with the whole world and made you people of this century who you are today. I also found out how to prove the theorem to be true. Therefore, it is rightfully my theorem even if the Egyptians owned it.
TNT: How did you prove your theorem?
Pythagoras: There are hundreds of proofs for my theorem. You should learn about President Garfield’s proof. However, I like the proof for my theorem that actually uses squares. The area of any square is the length of a leg multiplied by itself. If you found the area of squares that share the legs of any right triangle and added those areas, you would find out that the area of the square that has the hypotenuse as a side is equal to the sum of the areas of the squares that have the legs as sides. I know this may be confusing, but I hope understand what I just said. I am sorry to say that I can’t explain any better.
TNT: Don’t feel sorry. I understood what you said. I learned this from the Glenn Research Center. I will let you know that our interview is being posted online as we speak. Give me a second to speak to the audience.
Pythagoras: What does it mean to “post something online?”
TNT: I might not be able to explain to you. We have something called the Internet. You probably don’t know about because the people of your time don’t have it yet. We use the Internet to learn, to entertain ourselves, and to post whatever we want people to see just like my boss Thien Han Nguyen is doing with our interview. When people of this century say that they are “post something online”, that’s just another way of saying that we are posting something on the Internet.
TNT: For those of you who are reading this interview, I want to let you know that you will have a better understanding of the proof Pythagoras was talking about by checking out this link.
Pythagoras: What do you think of the proof I just gave you?
TNT: I like it better than the proof from President Garfield. Are you a religious or did you just devote your life to mathematics?
Pythagoras: I was also in interested in science. Yes, I am a religious man. I started my own faith, Pythagoreanism. My followers are called the Pythagoreans.
TNT: Pythagoras, did you find all of your discoveries all by yourself or did your Pythagoreans help you?
Pythagoras: I had help from my people. When we found out that my theorem is actually true, we decided to work with it daily and that is how we found another discovery.
TNT: What did you discover?
Pythagoras: My people discovered the numbers that you call “irrational numbers.” At first, when we discovered them, we called them “the unspeakable numbers” because we believe that numbers and shapes rule the universe, but we didn’t know anything about these numbers. Once we discovered these numbers, I told my followers to refrain from speaking about these numbers to outsiders until we learned more about these numbers, unless they wanted a death sentence.
TNT: How is Pythagoreanism a religion if it is all about math? Don’t religions have beliefs that are about deities or topics related to something outside the material world?
Pythagoras: The faith I created is a legitimate religion for this reason. We worship beans during the time that we are not studying mathematics or science. Beans are very sacred. My order believes in trans-migration of the soul. When we die, our souls will live on in other bodies. Most of the time, our souls will migrate into the bodies of pea plants. Worshipping pea plants is our way of respecting our loved ones after they have passed away. The pea plants not only contained our ancestors’ souls, but they also bear a strong resemblance to human body parts. Eating pea plants is an act of cannibalism.
TNT: You have a very interesting religion. I know about your contributions to mathematics, but what have you done for science.
Pythagoras: Science uses many formulas. My people and I try our best to contribute our formulas to science. I have a question about this hi-tech world of yours. Were any of my discoveries useful for the advancement of technology in any way?
TNT: I don’t know if any of your work contributed to the advancement of technology in any way. However, I do know that science and math have helped people advance in technology even if your work wasn’t responsible for it. We have used formulas to help us build. Science has helped us in technology more than anything else has and it continues to do so even now. I want you to know that your theorem is very useful and is very easy to learn. Many people will remember your theorem long after they forget any other mathematical formulas.
Pythagoras: I am glad to hear that.
TNT: Thank you for your time here with me.
Pythagoras: Thank you for inviting me here to your time. I really enjoyed learning about my fame and how I have helped people of this generation. I have to go now. I don’t want to stay here and let my work go to waste.
(A few minutes after Pythagoras returns home and TNT is back, he sees his master)
TNT: Hi, Thien Han. I am back. Are you thinking about recording my interview with Pythagoras in your blog. I think that it will boost the number of likes and followers you have for your blog. Even if it doesn’t, it is still worth recording.
Thien Han: That is exactly what I have been doing during the time you were interviewing Pythagoras. Now hand the time over to me and let me speak to my readers.
TNT: Okay. I will let you speak for the rest of the time you have with your readers..
Thien Han: What you saw above is TNT’s interview with Pythagoras. You have had two weeks off of my lessons about the application of math to the real world. I hope all of you enjoyed my joke page. Please leave comments even if you didn’t like this post or even if you disliked the whole blog up to this post. I need feedback from all of my viewers in spite of the fact that many of them probably don’t like this blog according to my stats. I will teach another lesson next week unless I change my mind or get interrupted by another guest speaker. I won’t be posting until next week. Peace out until next week.
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